​Much more genius is needed to cultivate love than to command armies

WHERE PSYCHOLOANALYSTS FAIL MISERABLY
The combination of these two elements – enchantment and surrender – is, then, essential to the love which we shall be discussing. . . . What exists in love is surrender due to enchantment. Such are the ingredients that lead to perfect love and affection.

Whatever is done from love always occurs beyond good and evil. –Friedrich Nietsche

The disaffection, neurosis, anguish and frustration encountered by psychoanalysis comes no doubt from being unable to love or to be loved, from being unable to give or take pleasure, but the radical disenchantment comes from artful affection  and its failure.

Only those who lie completely outside seduction are ill, even if they remain fully capable of loving and making love. Psychoanalysis believes it treats the disorder of sex and desire, but in reality it is dealing with the disorders of seduction. . . . The most serious deficiencies always concern charm and not pleasure, enchantment and not some vital or sexual satisfaction.

Once lovers (the seeker of love) have penetrated the mind, making the beloved fantasize about them, it is easy to lower resistance and create physical surrender. Skilled lovers do not improvise; they do not leave this process to chance. Like any good general, they plan and strategize, aiming at the beloved’s particular weaknesses.

The main obstacle to becoming a skilled lover is this foolish prejudice we have of seeing love and romance as some kind of sacred, magical realm where things just fall into place, if they are meant to. This might seem romantic and quaint, but it is really just a cover for our laziness. What will seduce a person is the effort we expend on their behalf, showing how much we care, how much they are worth. Leaving things to chance is a recipe for disaster, and reveals that we do not take love and romance very seriously. It was the effort Casanova expended, the artfulness he applied to each affair that made him so devilishly seductive. Falling in love is a matter not of magic but of psychology. Once you understand your target’s psychology, and strategize to suit it, you will be better able to cast a “magical” spell. A seducer sees love not as sacred but as warfare, where all is fair. Skilled lovers are never self-absorbed. Their gaze is directed outward, not inward.

4 thoughts on “​Much more genius is needed to cultivate love than to command armies

  1. Hmmm “Their gaze is directed outward, not inward”. I find gazing solely outwards particularly dangerous; perhaps, I have failed to understand you this time around: In this case, I should endeavor to seek clarity. I hope I find it with regards to that statement.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thanks for your kind and honorable quest for clarity.
    Here, I am addressing the individual who has first mastered himself/herself, meaning that he has first gazed deep within himself first and discovered the gold inside of them and hence has a bounty to share with their lover.

    It is when a person has found the treasures within them that they can really love. It is like entering the realm of love with a fist that has plenty to share. Then, in that case, they can be able to arouse deep love in another for, in every being there is a diamond hidden within, only that sometimes we have to clean it first. The process of love is unknown to many because all they do is hover around in their spiritual sleep and whatever encounters they make in this life is usually mostly lust masquerading as love. End result? Endless divorces and break ups that leave many discouraged and thinking that love doesn’t exist.

    Thanks for your beautiful question.

    Liked by 1 person

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